As life moves on, sometimes we don't get to do the things we once loved. Whether it's sleeping in past 8:00 am, staying up until 5:00 am drinking, playing hours of video games, going to the gym or eating whatever you feel like, growing old has it's perks and realities. And ever increasing responsibility. From the days when I had 2 or 6 hour flights to kill by writing Dom's Dish to "moving up the corporate ladder" and extra daily commute time, sometimes things change. I've come to realize this, and I've come to terms with adapting to the changes as the days, weeks, months and years go by. I wish I could say that for my favorite sport. Football.
From my early days, I can remember sitting back to watch games on Sundays. Saturdays, not so much - we didn't have any "big" teams to follow up in North Jersey. I remember rooting for the Jets - Freeman McNeil, Kenny O'Brien and Al Toooooon. I also remember the amazing run the Giants had for Super Bowl XXI and that Zeke Mowatt - the TE - came to my school. I was in 2nd grade (that was also the year we hatched butterflies). Looking back, Zeke had 1 catch for 6 yards that game, but he was in my grammar school, 6 foot something, and I got a picture with him (actually it was a Polaroid). Also looking back at a quick wikipedia article, a 30-second spot cost a mere $600,000.
From that point forward, I jumped teams - Jets (pics will show me and my younger brother geared up in uniforms and helmets in the backyard), KC Chiefs (got a nice windbreaker that mom gave me, times were tough, but I liked the colors), Redskins (probably a bandwagon fan around the time of Doug Williams, I did ask for and receive a Starter jacket around 7th grade), Giants (who can forget Super Bowl XXV - Desert Storm, Whitney Houston, that 9+ minute drive with Otis Anderson and of course, Wide Right!) Heck, I even played football in 7th and 8th grade - I recall the "camp" style practices hitting the sleds, playing in games, making tackles, missing blocks. Then, throughout much of high school though, I had lost interest. My concentration was on high school and all the activities I could pull off - marching band, Boilermaker football, HS plays, Student Government, girlfriends, Track, more drama club, Math Club.....bottom line, anything to get out of the house. More on that later. Bottom line, aside from a few Knicks or Rangers games on the 10 inch TV in my room and maybe passing by the TV in the living room or at a grandparents' house, Football was "meh" for me at the time.
Even into college, I hadn't watched much pro football the first few years. However, I started to get into the college games on Saturday more - there were a lot more options. I remember catching a few games when Syracuse would play and that Donovan McNabb was something to watch. I remember watching the draft when he got boo'ed. I didn't really care, but hoped he would prove the fans wrong. By this time I was pretty much out of my house. Had spent summers at school and Central Jersey was my new home. I found myself getting more into football and had settled on the Eagles as a team to follow for two main reasons: convenience (broadcast option) and McNabb. Never having hated or been against any team (except one), there was no reason I couldn't like the Eagles. Over the next 4-5 years, I would follow them closer. When I got big - I mean BIG into Madden Football, the Eagles were always my franchise. I would build around McNabb, Westbook, anyone else who came along. Cherry pick from other teams and take the Eagles to the Super Bowl - being a bartender much of this time, left me plenty of time to play video games, and the schedule allowed me to stay up til 3, 4, 5am playing. I remember playing so long my eyes hurt - but we won that Lombardi trophy together McNabb!
Staying in the greater Philadelphia area over the past 13 years, I've risen and fallen with the Eagles fans and the roller coaster of emotion. From the many NFC Championship games, to the acquisition of T.O. and the Super Bowl appearance....to seeing the choppers over T.O.'s house on my commute home while he did situps in his driveway, to many Andy Reid press conferences, draft picks, and more disappointments. All the while, learning more and more about the game and paying attention to more of the league via Fantasy Football. Oh yeah, and that little "blog" I was doing along the way, talking mainly about Pro Football, "covering" scandals like the Michael Vick (dogs, Ron Mexico), also MLB, NCAA, golf and more. But mainly, the NFL became the focus of my sports interests.
Reading as much as I did about the NFL over the years, and listening to sports talk radio as much as I have (Mike & Mike, Mike Missanelli, NFL Sirius radio) and especially my interest in the "scandals" and legal system, I've come to learn a few things. From the Big Ben issue in Colorado to Michael Vick to Plaxico Burress's misfire, to many DUI's along the way, it was always stated how powerful NFL Security has been. And more increasingly over the past few years, hiring former federal investigators and retired law enforcement.From the appointment of Roger Goodell and the "hard-ass" he was early on, and the millions and millions and billions and billions of dollars thrown at players via free agency, TV contracts, etc. "Protect the shield" was a term thrown around by many.
In terms of all corporations out there - even Apple, Google, Pharmaceuticals, News agencies, Political parties, Disney, and any Wall Street firm.....up against any other sports league - the NFL is pretty much the most powerful corporation in USA - maybe even the Western Hemisphere....quite possibly the world. The numbers in revenue alone speak for themselves, and the fact that there isn't really any competition to keep them honest....think about it. Aside from actual Governments and Terrorist organizations that bring actual force.....
When Roger Goodell came into office, he was the no-joke commissioner. I wrote about it here, and referenced his reputation as a Fantasy Commissioner. Harsh suspensions, fines - protect that shield or pay the price. Then over time he softened. Then, a lock-out - a multi-billion dollar organization lose money? Soften the stance and give some "bro-hugs" on draft night to ease the pain.
Then one the players kills his girlfriend, then turns the gun on himself at the stadium before gameday? It was more about gun control and him suffering too many concussions. (Jevon Belcher, 12/1/2012) Everyone missed the boat that domestic violence was the point to be taken from that tragic situation.
By now you know what I'm getting at. Ray Rice - caught on camera outside an elevator dragging his girlfriend out treating her like a rag doll or corpse. No jail time. He's a good guy, it was a one time thing. He's good for the Baltimore Ravens. He accepts his 2 games. We all know the criticism - 4 games for PED's or pot, 2 games for hitting a woman; a season for smoking pot a few times, 2 games for Ray. Public outcry? We made a mistake - 6 games next time, but Ray is good with 2. The lack of consistency during Roger's term is just ludicrous. A few weeks back, a kicker gets 4 games for having a beer while on vacation from work at his house. Now someone is convicted of Domestic Violence and gun charges, but no action from the NFL.
Listen, I was not present in the meetings on Park Avenue between Roger, Ray and his now wife Janay, Ravens leadership and everyone else in the room. I wasn't there to know that they did or didn't review the video. But having the police report being out there citing what happened (later corroborated by the inside elevator video) 2 games was not enough. Bull crap that there wasn't a policy for domestic violence and nothing to go by. Roger nearly ruled with an iron fist those first few years. There is no doubt in my mind that someone paid by the NFL (someone in security force of former FBI agents, etc) could have "found a way" to watch the now famous elevator footage in the five months before the ruling was handed down. I don't know that Roger viewed it, but when you're the head honcho of a multi-billion dollar organization that needs public trust to do business, you've got to find a way.
As stated pertaining to me, I know things are changing. Back on 9/11/2001 there was no Social Media. Youtube, cell phone video? Our phones could barely take pictures. Back during Super Bowl XXI a 30-second spot was about 1/7th off what it was earlier this year. As time goes by, we must adapt. From iReports to instant Twitter feedback, 2014 is much different than 2001, let alone 1987. We must progress as a society. The NFL has fallen behind on domestic violence, and other issues.
Three things come to my mind right now: Terminator X, Willy Santiago and Staind.
Staind (rock/metal band) released "Break the Cycle" back in 2001. Even though no song really fits what I'm trying to say - we as a society need to break the cycle when it comes to domestic violence. It's one thing if it's two people locked away somewhere and a dysfunctional dependent relationship, but in this case, as with many, children and families are involved. What Ray Rice did in that elevator is inexcusable. His reaction to her unconscious body is what makes it worse. What tops it off is his request for "no cops" and his ability to escape from any legal consequences. Another privileged athlete/celebrity getting away with something they shouldn't.
Hearing tales from survivors that were able to escape abusive relationships, while in the relationship, the victims convince themselves that they are at fault. They make excuses for their abusers, When asked to press charges they decline more often than not. This caused changes in laws in many places - if the "state" has evidence, they choose to charge the abuser regardless of what the victim says. I don't know if that was the first time Ray Rice got into it with his girlfriend/wife. I hope for their sake it hasn't happened since. While I don't know if it was the first time - I have a guess based on the footage: it wasn't anything new. Janay's statements on Tuesday supporting her husband still and slamming the media for "causing this" to me is more proof that the relationship is dysfunctional. On to Willy Santiago - [spoiler alert] the character from "A Few Good Men" who received the Code Red and dies, sparking a trial. Near the end of the movie, after the verdict is handed down, the two Marines are dishonorably discharged from the Marine Corps. When debating whether or not they did anything wrong, a quote is delivered by Dawson that totally summarizes my point: "We were supposed to fight for people who couldn't fight for themselves. We were supposed to fight for Willy." In this case, the NJ Justice System and the NFL were supposed to fight for Janay, and thereby act as a voice for all victims of domestic violence. Whether her stories of support for Ray lead to the elimination/reduction of the punishment, apparently more education on the dynamics of abusive relationships and domestic violence victims needs to be our there for the "leaders" in law enforcement and the NFL to follow.
A product of a variety of music growing up, one song I had taped from the radio from the early 90's by Terminator X definitely summarizes my feelings on the NFL and this situation. For Roger Goodell, the Baltimore Ravens and Ray Rice: "It all comes down to the money" ..."whether it's rainy or snowy or sunny, funny, I'm in it for the cash, I'm in it for the cash...the more you get, the more you want..."
The remarks of some of the NFL owners supporting Roger Goodell are appalling. I'll give you, for argument's sake, that he didn't see the tape (I don't believe it, but I'll concede that). But for as powerful a private corporation that they are; they could and should have seen the video. Two games? You support Roger still? Oh, so appoint an "independent investigation" with someone who has done business with the NFL before and two owners to oversee it? This conspiracy and cover-up is Nixonian at best. Probably more along the lines of JFK. Problem is, the truth will catch up to everyone involved. I hope for his daughter's sake Ray Rice breaks the cycle. I hope this raises more awareness for those who can't fight for themselves. And remember folks - it all comes down to the money. The arrogant owner, Roger, agents and a greedy player and his wife tried to sweep it under a rug. Too bad the rug wasn't big enough: some casino closed, people lost their jobs, and some smart man or woman cashed in with TMZ exposing the hypocrisy of it all.
Bottom line, there are us among the viewing public who saw that video inside the elevator and didn't just see two people, we saw our loved ones and recalled the violent acts committed against our family and friends that may have gone hidden for some time. I
applaud the strong women who have called into sports talk radio or written to key bloggers/writers to share their emotional stories about what it's like to be in a dysfunctional and abusive relationship. It's not always just the physical violence, it's also verbal and emotional abuse that leads some to become a shell of themselves after months or years of abuse. I was shocked when it was two games, but figured the NFL did it's homework.
Obviously, having lived through this myself, this story has piqued my interest and I have listened closely along the way. I referenced a few teams I've been a fan of and why I was able to become an Eagles fan so easily: it wasn't the Cowboys. He was a Cowboys fan. I'm breaking the cycle.
I didn't watch tonight's Baltimore game. For the first time in many years, I'm questioning when I'll watch again. Shame on those who commit domestic violence. Shame on the NJ court system. Shame on the NFL.
Links:
http://deadspin.com/ray-rice-arrested-in-atlantic-city-after-altercation-wi-1524046109
http://www.tmz.com/videos/0_c5nk3w3n/
http://www.tmz.com/2014/09/08/ray-rice-elevator-knockout-fiancee-takes-crushing-punch-video/
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0104257/quotes
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N6MLLSArEz4
http://grantland.com/the-triangle/roger-goodell-need-to-step-down/
